Handfasting

By

Willow

The Great Wheel turns yet again, the year moves on and Spring is in the air. The nights are drawing out, the days are becoming brighter and warmer and our hearts lift with the joy the season brings. Now is the time of the growing love between the Young Buck God and the Maiden Goddess as they move towards their Sacred Union at Beltane, sharing their love and fiery passion with all those folk who are aware! Within our souls and hearts the joy of the new season brings an awakening to our own desires, both sexual and loving. Lets face it we can hardly avoid it! After all, it's going on all around us - with the courtship of the birds, the new born lambs in the fields, and the mating of a myriad other wild creatures - it's a time for loving! As the world around us wakes, so do we and our thoughts turn to love. From Imbolc onwards is the start of the Handfasting season! Those who are in love and in a strong and long lasting relationship may wish to celebrate their joining and choose to become Handfast - which simply put is a Pagan marriage.

This lovely ritual has it roots in ancient times and many believe that it developed in the Celtic cultures of Europe and the British Isles. Originally it was a betrothal or a promise of marriage between two people who would then spend a traditional term of a year and day together to see if they were compatible. After this time, and if they were in agreement the vows could be taken again and they would be considered married. The Handfasting ritual takes its name from the joining and tying of the hands of the couple to be wed, usually with cords. This is where the term "tying the knot" comes from today in reference to getting married. The Handfasting ritual would have been performed by an important member of the community - chieftain, Priest, Priestess, Shaman or Elder, who would have guided the couple through the ritual and presided over them as they exchanged vows in front of witnesses, probably the whole community. The witnessing of the ritual by friends and the community would make it law in the eyes of the community as no official records would have been kept until the introduction of a "Church based" wedding.

This custom spanned the centuries and was still legal in many parts until 1753 when one Lord Hardwick passed an Act through Parliament declaring that marriages in England could only be legal if sanctioned by the Church. This law however was exempt in both Scotland and the Channel Islands. The Act set the precedence for modern Church marriages in the UK ever since with some updates being allowed for modern times. However Handfastings continued to be legal in Scotland up until 1939, particularly in the Highlands and Islands where they may not have had a permanent Clergyman. If this was the case a Handfasting ritual could be performed and then when a travelling Clergyman visited the community the marriage could then be legalised by the Church. As a direct result of Lord Hardwick's Act and its strict marriage laws the famous town of Gretna Green became popular with English couples running away to get married as Scotland was outside the jurisdiction of English law. Gretna Green is still a popular choice for marriage because of the romantic associations it has had of eloping lovers running away to seal their love against all odds!

Gretna Green Wedding

Today, Handfasting is the choice of many Pagans and Magical Folk when choosing to commit to a partner. It is sometimes, although not always preceded by a civil ceremony. Whether or not the marriage has been legally performed, in the eyes of the pagan community the couple Handfasted are seen as married within Pagan tradition. For those people who follow a Pagan Path the vows taken within a Handfasting ceremony are no less binding than those taken in a Church or Registry Office.

There are many different types of ritual for Handfastings and indeed many couples prefer to write their own. Whatever the choice of ceremony a Handfasting is a very beautiful and meaningful rite and one that is most personal to the participants, being a sacred and public declaration of two peoples love and commitment to each other and their decision to bond together. At its most basic it is a ritual to show just this but at a deeper level a Handfasting is a Binding Spell, designed to keep two people together and as such should not be entered into lightly. When walking a Magical Path, often in ones training we are taught that Binding Spells are not to be undertaken as this type of magic is often of the more grey area and more often than not performed without the consent of the person to be bound. This is a whole article in itself! But, never the less this is exactly what a Handfasting Ceremony is and so the two people should be fully aware of this and any consequences that may follow. This is why it is MOST important to get the wording on the ritual absolutely correct for each Handfasting performed.

In my experience many in the first throws of love and passion, newly together but blissfully happy, the most sensible option is to be Handfasted for the traditional year and a day, renewing the vows if it is still desired when the time is up. This gives the couple time to grow with each other and to see if their love will last the distance. If a couple is in a more established relationship then they may not want to bother with the year and day option, but opt for the "as long as love lasts". This means that they will be married in Pagan tradition for as long as they are together and love is shared between them. If love fades they are free to go their separate ways, no longer one bound to the other. Sometimes couples will want to be Handfast for "this lifetime and all others to come". This is the one I am most wary about and will refuse to perform. This is a Binding Spell for eternity and often people will not have thought this through! If it is your Soul Path to be together in this life time then so be it, but that does not necessarily mean that this will be the way for you both forever. Being bound together in this way could stop your respective souls from continuing whatever path they have in store - new loves, new experience etc. Also if all goes very wrong in your relationship you may have to replay it life after life! So, much care should be given when deciding which vows you may wish to make and the wording of them

The most symbolic part of the ritual itself is the tying of the hands. This fastening of hands is steeped in tradition and magical meaning. In some rituals the hands are tied just for the duration of the ritual, in others they are left tied until the marriage is consummated physically. One traditional way of tying the hands is to have the couple face each other, right hands together and left together to create the symbol for infinity while the cord is tied around their joined hands and knotted. This ancient sign in the form of a figure 8 symbolises the male and female conjunction, the two circles entwined one representing the Sun and the other the Moon. In times past this form of two handed Handfasting was the form that was seen as a legal contract between the couple throughout Europe whether the blessing of the Church was sought or not. However it was still recommended that the bride and groom attended Church as soon as possible after the Handfasting to sign the Register. Some people opted for right hands only being joined, with the cord knotted around the wrist, but for those who had their left hands joined without the tying of a knot it usually meant that the woman was being taken as the Mistress and therefore would not be able to make a claim on the mans fortune when he died - this was left to the real wife, but for the duration of their joining the Mistress would be under the mans protection. The offspring of this union, however, would be recognised as legal heirs second to any children he may have with his legal wife. All other forms of Handfasting (accept the left hand ritual) were seen as legally binding contracts either for engagement or marriage purposes.

Handfastings today still contains much ancient symbology such as the tying of the hands with cords. The colours of the cords can also be important to each individual couple, as colour has always been linked with symbology and magic. Below is a list of just a few of the colours and their meanings all of which may be taken into account when a couple is planning their Handfasting:

Red - Signifies: will, passion, strength, fertility, courage, health, vigour, lust, danger, Holiday: Yule, Planet: Mars, Day: Tuesday Astrological: Scorpio

Orange - Signifies: encouragement, adaptability, stimulation, attraction, plenty, kindness. Holiday: Candlemas, Deities: Brigit, Planets: Sun, Mars, Mercury Days: Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday

Yellow - Signifies: attraction, charm, confidence, balance, harmony, knowledge, learning, concentration, persuasion, jealousy, joy, comfort, Planet: Mercury, Day: Wednesday, Astrological: Gemini, Leo

Green - Signifies: finances, fertility, luck, success energy, charity, growth, rejuvenation, prosperity, nurturing, beauty, health, ambition, counteract greed and jealousy, plants kingdom including herbal healing, Planets: Venus, Mercury, Days: Friday, Wednesday Holidays: Spring Equinox, Beltane, Astrological: Taurus Deities: Persephone, Hestia

Blue - Signifies: tranquillity, understanding, patience, health, truth, devotion, sincerity, honour, loyalty, peace, wisdom, protection during sleep, astral projection Light Blue: tranquillity, understanding, patience, health Dark Blue: for a safe journey, longevity, strength Planets: Moon, Venus, Saturn, Jupiter Days: Monday, Friday, Saturday, Thursday Astrological: Libra, Sagittarius

Purple - Signifies: power, piety, sanctity, sentimentality, tension, sadness amplification of other energies. wisdom, high ideals, spiritual protection and healing, psychic ability, protective energy, strength, progress Planet: Jupiter, Day: Thursday Astrological: Sagittarius

Pink - Signifies: unity, honor, truth, romance, happiness, healing, familial or emotional love (rather than sexual), friendship, affections, unselfish emotions, spiritual healing, banishing hatred Gem: rose quartz Planet: Venus, Day: Friday

Another symbol of the joining of the man to the woman is the jumping of the Besom Broom. The broom is symbolic of the sexual union between man and woman - the handle or shaft of the broom represents the phallus whilst the brush is the vagina. In many traditional hand crafted besom brooms it is common to carve an image of a penis in the end that attaches to the brush. Witches and Pagans keep broomsticks as a reminder of mans joining to woman, and of the sacred union of the Goddess and God. The besom broom is used during a Handfasting ritual at the end when the vows have been taken. This is the time when the couple "jump the Broom" and seal their union symbolically. Not only is the besom broom representative of the sexual union but it also symbolises a threshold that the couple are about to cross - one that leads to a new beginning as husband and wife. They jump the besom together, hand in hand to show that they are two parts of a whole, working together towards a bright new future and all it holds. This jumping of the besom becomes a leap of faith so to speak that they take together. Faith in each other to face what life has ahead for them both good and bad. The besom broom is taken home by the couple and hung over the bed or over the front door - bringing fertility and blessings to the relationship and their home.

However, the besom broom has been associated with weddings for many centuries. It first became popular with the African American population during the time of slavery. Slaves had no rights to marry as the Slaveholders considered them purely as property, so they had no rights under the American law. Marriage rituals were important to the Africans as they had marriage customs from their own cultures, so to be denied this custom was anathema to them and they soon developed new rituals within their "slave" communities using what they had to hand. Taking vows in front of witnesses, much as our Celtic ancestors did, and then jumping over the besom broom for many of the reason we still do today, became a recognised union within their own community. The jumping of the broom is still incorporated in many African American weddings today to honour the slaves from the past and celebrate their cultural heritage.

Today many Handfastings are performed all over the world. Where there are Pagans and Witches this ceremony will always be recognised within these communities. Handfastings are still performed by a qualified person - usually a Priest and Priestess known to the couple. A scared space is created in a place of the couples choosing, usually outdoors. The Altar is set up and decorated with flowers and sacred symbols. The Circle is created to make the space a Temple, a place apart from the mundane world where the energy can be built up and contained. Friends and family gather around the outside of the Circle, to bear witness as is tradition, to the vows taken by the couple and their joining of hands. Once this has been done, rings have been exchanged and the besom has been jumped there is much celebration. Handfastings, like any other weddings are a wonderful, romantic and joyous occasion to be celebrated by all who are involved. The couple are blessed by one and all for a bright and happy future and they carry their love forward with them.

So, from the mists of time this beautiful ceremony comes down to and is still very important to today's Pagans and like minded folk. Not much seems to have changed really, except maybe the ceremony is more relevant to the 21st century. But the ancient traditions from many cultures and the energies these carry come down through time to empower each and every Handfasting and bestow their blessings. Even though it is not recognised by law as yet in this country, it is still a binding and sacred ritual entered into with love and foresight and Handfastings will continue from the past and well into the future.